05/18/13

Best name ever or Recall

I grew up in a zoo: dogs, cats, guinea pigs, hamsters, birds and a bunch of sisters. Everybody had a name but not everybody responded to recall. Like when mom called, it depended from her tone. Many times it was a signal to hide or something good awaits. For the animals it was not as strict to respond as for us, so when the dog did not come, when called, it was not a big deal. Same time studying and knowing how important is recall with dogs in this modern society makes me emphasize its importance. It’s not anymore just fenced in safe place where it’s not life threatening situations. Within knowledge of basics and more advanced approaches than usual, it appears of highest significance to make your dog respond to his name 100% of the time.read dogs body language

Regularly walking streets, hanging out in parks and other social places is usual for a dog owner. Dogs training is put to the task every single minute walking outside your door. Sometimes dogs do what we want them to do and sometimes they don`t, its normal. But what’s not, if they don`t respond to their name instantly! That’s Nr.1 task to master when you have a dog! We might think the dog is stupid, stubborn or whatever, but what it really is : dog has not been taught, that his name is the best sound in the world! So he looks at you and comes even when you whisper his name. With that been said, you need to understand that by mastering this simple training you will avoid lots of drama or even save your dog’s life.

Why do I say its life or death? Because, if he sees a squirrel across busy street and is ready to take off, by just saying his name, you will change his path from being hit. Same as, if he wants to approach somebody like runner or another stranger with recalling you save yourself from possible lawsuit! Because who knows, what kind of attitude they have! As we are in public space for four hours everyday, we have met so many dog disliking people, that we could start a registry! For instance there are these few older runners, who are very unpleasant from the looks and one of them always carries a pepper spray threatening if a dog comes close and he will react to it! (This person has already sprayed other dogs in parks. Its absolute crazy as they run in front of the dogs and act like they are there to harm them, not realizing as they have startled or been seen only as chasing object with whom to play!)

You might be wondering, how do I get my dog always respond to his name?

  1. Always say his/her name in a positive tone!
  2. Start off with highest interest treats (rewarding when they responds to name)
  3. When you have Nr1 and Nr.2 in check, practice it with distractions.

DON`Ts

No matter how angry you get when your buddy does something wrong, don`t use their name! Simply say NO, BAD DOG, whatever BUT not his name! Strong emotions associated with the name can be lethal in the end as dog will simply ignore it associating it with bad memories.dogs name is the best sound in the world

It’s not an easy task to remember but we have to drop negative tone when saying dogs name. I have realized my own mistake doing it in the past and then wondering why he ignored recall. From using Nietzsche (Stressed out, oh you little shit! Worried tone) when upset to always Nietzsche (higher pitch happy tone) and big fat NO or LEAVE IT when done something undesirable.

You need to understand that a dog is a creature of simplicity, they don`t categorize our attitudes or think more of the situation in a long run, they associate key element with provided emotions and mostly pick on negative vibes to stay. If by any chance your dog already has issues with his name, because of misbehavior and your anger following it. Please turn the course of your path. Its lethal for the dog to think, that his name is the best thing on the planet!

 

 

 

05/18/13

Myth: Older wiser.

Myth : “Older people are smarter and they have figured it all out.”

I was raised to respect elders and their authority. From childhood to now, I have been constantly attracted to older people as source of tremendous knowledge. They always shared stories and instructions. If I had a question or problem I turned to somebody older.

Being curious and knowledge thirsty and not questioning authority as a kid, did root belief of “they know it all” It never occurred to me until later in life, that laying unquestionable trust could be harmful as you blindly follow the leads. You do tings their way, is that good or bad. Naïve, innocent and blind trust, as disagreeing was considered disrespectful. On the other hand, I have been very fortunate to have compassionate, wise and creative teachers throughout my school days.Abraham Lincoln quote

After years and years busting this myth from “know it all” father and grandma to relationships with older men, led to conclusion that age is not an indicator of being wiser. Since the moment I felt in my heart that what I had been told could be wrong, I started to think for myself, I started questioning, I started to look for more perspectives rather than one. Becoming a troubled soul or rebel, if you like.

Now, my new take on things is: “Don’t assume if they are older they are wiser. Ask if they are experienced in that particular case!” As well, I am working on not under minding my own age or younger people. If I can be ahead of my game, why can’t others be, right? Its not easy. Its old belief system I have built over the years and unconsciously still following my own stereotype. Its partly true, that as older you get the wiser you should be, but its not always the case. You can be 90 and not learned a damn lesson in your life and play out “I am older” card just to pretend to know it all, when all you have is age and arrogance.

A while ago I heard Abraham Lincoln’s quote: “Its not the years in your life that count, but life in your years!” Could have not agreed more. As experiences should be taken as lessons to make wiser choices not to stay the same, but step up. As Albert Einstein said: ”We cannot solve our problems with the same thinking we used when we created them.” So I encourage you to not evaluate your wisdom according to your age, but what you have gone through and learned. Too many (like I used to) misunderstand the factual difference between older, smarter and wiser. Never stop learning my friends!

 

05/14/13

Lighter and match

As my long time companion -lighter decided to die on me unexpectedly, I had to turn for help to his ancestors – matches. With a quick stroke pleasant smell and fire appears and disappears. Burnt match sits by me for next 5 minutes until I get up and throw it away. Short lived life of this individual made me think of progress in terms of evolution in inventions. Once it was sensation and nobody could think or live without them and now we have all these other options.lighter and matches

The point of returning to beginnings is so primal and simple. Natural feel of simplicity been possible in 21st century is breath of fresh air. Electronic and fast paced times slowly, but tense robs us of humanity and organic understanding. Enormous clashes between generations as the gap deepens.

Technically inventions of same category always keep the main purpose letting consumer to decide whats better fit for their needs. Like, its easy and nice to lit up candles with matches, but not so comfortable carrying a box of noisy when running around. On the other hand a lighter is not easy to break and holds fire longer.

Same purpose, different strengths,like people. Nobody can stop the time or progress, but what we can do is to choose our options; to move along or stay in one period of time. The beauty of these times is that everybody has a chance to be more advanced and take part in 21st century marathon of developments. To refuse and stay in same state of mind is a choice. To be ignorant is a choice. To be happy or unhappy is a choice.

There is time and place for everything. Modern person same like modern dog is a mix of raw natural instincts and needs combined with more advanced options to live a fulfilled life! To achieve balance there is a huge need of embracing the reality of who we are and what we can be! Acceptance that old-school is past and sweet memories, but not a way to stretch it further. Live in the moment and enjoy the possibilities in front of you!

Be as lighter, stronger outside and burning longer than a match. Let yourself enjoy the progress and not stay stuck in beginning stage. Every seed has its potential to grow, choose growth but don`t forget the nature!

05/11/13

Distractions of good cause

As I pass through the store,I keep on picking items from the floor, as I enter the fitting room,I help employee to gather mess whats left behind before I proceed to my business. If I see wrong, I try to fix it or at least make it just. I been told,that I can’t save the world, I can’t like everybody and vice versa. But something inside of me does not let go off this feeling. Urge of “common sense courtesy ”. I was not born with it, but developed through time very strong sense and respect whats right and none of it included laying around dog poop in parks or bras all over the store floor, so I do what others did not after themselves.Choose Love

I have come to realization, that I truly don’t care, does anybody see while I am doing good, it makes me feel at ease and gets the unwanted item out of my way. Another point is that its not my job, but I enjoy walking through a well conditioned path,so I remove unnecessary troubles. Most people will stomp over anything. Ridiculous.

Many times other customers assume I work there, its funny when I say I don’t and disbelief covers their face. Its hard to see mess in the store as I am tempted to pick up or organize shelves myself. BUT,I remind myself that if I proceed I will never get out of the store and probably will not remember why I came here at first place. Distractions even if they are for good cause leads to loosing your own time.

I have to constantly remind myself that I should not always do other job, even if I can and know how to. Everything has its time and place and mine is to do what I came here for. If we decide to be sidetracked from own path to deal with other troubles, we have to make sure it benefits and respects us. Because if we let every little thing  bother us, we will never leave the store to go on about our life.

I will probably not stop making sure my surroundings wherever I go are clean, but what I should remember tho is that I need to limit my worry and always stay on my track. Without loosing dignity or get aggravated with other irresponsibility. I know I can’t save everybody, but what I do know is that little things matter. Twinge of conscience always accompanies me when I don’t do what I knew was right.

Do you have a strong feeling whats wrong and right? Do you take action, even if that’s not your responsibility?

I encourage to do the right thing,but without loosing your track!

Have a wonderful day my friends!

05/10/13

Turn the lights on when you go

Being out and about in public everyday, lets meet various kinds of people with their dogs. Sometimes its a small talk, sometimes its more deeper. In the middle of conversation comes up “What do you do?” I start telling them that I work with dogs

“So you are dog trainer?”

“Not only,I work with people too”

“So you work with therapy dogs and disabled people?”

“Not really, but its kind of therapy. I work with both sides. The human and their dog. You see, dog is a reflection of ones person and if one has issues other does too. Its coaching,for the benefit of both.”

Then I see a questioning and intrigued person in front of me and I rush to reply.

“This is a unique approach to strive for excellence in human and canine!”

“Oh…”Pit Bull Pack

For regular person never heard of anything like that,its puzzled picture, but for me talking things through helps to see what they understand and know about themselves and dogs.

 

Interacting and telling others what I stand for brings more clarity to myself,as I stumble here and there over my European tongue to pick right words and pronounce properly so I can be understood. Practice and repetition fruits in clarity and excellence. It provides road-map of your thoughts and actions. As you think and do more same over and over, as more it becomes part of you. Is it bad or good it develops into a habit.

Clear vision of your goal ensures faster arrival at your destination. Procrastination and doubts tho are like fog, slow you down and makes you wonder. Same like when you walk through the room without turning on the light and run into half way opened door on the other side, Bam! Should have taken time to switch it on! (Now I have bent glasses and hurting right side of my face and reminder to keep lights on when I walk)

Do you take time to enlighten your path with right tools? Do you specify road-map of thoughts, actions and goals to arrive at your destination on time?

I encourage you to clarify the path you walk, so there is less confusion or bumping into doors!

05/2/13

Sometimes,I don`t mind a man leading.

Back in the school days, at first grades we had “folk dance”, climbing up the age scale we had “dance off” competitions every year between teams and schools and then at High school there was “Ballroom dancing”. Along the way with public school dancing, I attended additional Ballroom dancing courses. How body moves in the rhythm of music always fascinated me, it was my passion that let me escape everything while I was on the dance floor.  From day one I was told that, a man leads and woman follows. Too many times it was hard to pursue this idea, as I knew moves better and have natural leading tendency. Except, when instructor swirled me around, then I relayed on his expertise (well most of the time). I preferred solo`s but there was something magical about partnership. It was hard to let go of control and entirely trust my partner (my strong grip and posture did its part too), but I was continually reminded that its team work. You do it together as harmony of each others strengths and weaknesses.You have to have a good attitude during journey to enjoy destination

accept embrace enjoyAs we go about our daily walks, Cesar Milan idea how to walk “properly” bugs me. As he states, the dog has to be next to you or behind to symbolize that you are the pack leader. Absolute control. As I try to force my dog to walk that way at all times,I get more aggravated as he wants to go in his pace and does not show any dominance or pulling for that matter. When he freely walks he perfectly adjusts to my rhythm , being few feet in front or on the side. Yes there are moments when he does “drunk zig-zag walk” to sniff this and sniff that on both sides of the street. He is enjoying himself and that`s fine by me. Walking is not a treadmill stuck in four walls,its a brand new journey everyday, with new smells, new people and surprising weather changes along the way.

To enjoy and share wonderful moments you have to let go of your idea: Being in control of everything at all times. Embracing simplicity of two souls dancing away on the pavement is something to look forward to, rather then pushing, pulling and yelling at “bad employee”. Walking a dog should be harmonious and pleasant experience rather then “Not Again!” moment with attitude and negative perspective. Like thinking about how  dog gets excited to see others, how he always stops at that neighbors corner to mark, how he wants to take off when sees a bird etc. Instead, changing attitude (outlook) about things will change the level of happiness, when it comes to walk. Indulge,accept and try to see a walk from your dogs point of view, walk in his shoes- paw prints. Only by understanding your dogs perspective you can embrace the moments and bring the best out of it. Being at ease from now on. Trust your partner,enjoy yourself and you will have a dance of your life time, every day!

 

04/30/13

Predators among dog owners

In the midst of political restrictions from not allowing to have a dog in a rental to bashing ones breed constantly where ever you go; is a daily life for “Pit Bull” families. Its not enough that dog lovers have to deal with not dog people, but have to hold their peace with irresponsible dog owners as well. Societies pressure holds back many to have a healthy outgoing life in public; restricting to stay close only to their own kind (friends, family and Pit Bulls). Basically forcefully pushing; to unite in legions, which most form resistance or stay away in fear. Some say its a good thing, some like me disagree with injustice “In the land of the free!”Only unsocialized are awkward and aggressive

Mass produced hatred goes a long way by creating wrong beliefs and infecting dog owners everywhere. Those who eat out of hand of media are as threatening to dog lovers as not even more then not dog people. Prejudice. Too many dog owners who don’t own or have real experience around a “Pit Bull” think they know it all; walking by with their lab or chihuahua and throwing a fit. Same time you would be surprised how not only under-educated they are but in general irresponsible as well, when it comes to proper dog care! First of all illusion of having a “good dog breed”, secondly assuming that feed, sleep, walk is all that dog needs!Love is pure joy

There is a huge gap between dog owners: responsible and irresponsible. Responsible ones are lovers, who provide comfort to meet dogs needs, such as; nutritious diet, proper exercise/playtime routine, good housing conditions, training, socializing and respecting their personality with attention and quality time. Same like marriage,without prosperous input you will not have abundance of joy! That’s why dog lovers are happy people, you reap what you sow. On the other hand, there are those who mistake that just providing stereotypical basic needs (eat,sleep,walk) is good enough. Most of these people treat their dog as a thing or are control freaks. And of course unhappy.

Its fascinating to see haters among dog owners, but what can you expect out of control freaks? Low self-esteem, unsatisfied with everything in their way and immature. Poor dogs who have owners like that, they deserve better! Only people with love in their hearts should have a dog or a child for that matter,you can’t be a good parent if you lack unconditional love or don’t love yourself for starters!

Your dog is a reflection of your inner beauty. Love yourself and you shall love everything around YOU!

04/27/13

Joneses and Pit Bulls

N with a friendConstantly meeting other dog owners and their companions, has spread my horizons extensively. From learning about other breeds and their habits till observations. Most of the dog owners believe their dog is the best thing ever and I don’t blame them, as I am the same way. But there is a difference, between thinking everything is wonderful and actually being it true. After several interactions with same dogs and their owners,I could not help myself thinking over and over whats wrong with this picture! As us being well behaved and positive,there would follow UN-cooperation and clash.

To picture it better,imagine: one dog goes to another,sniffs and then starts to invite him to play (bounces and runs around, fake bite, wagging tail etc), next thing we know,the other dog runs to the owner or even better – yelps! Owner turns into defensive position to guard his dog and basically says “Your dog wants to kill!” Playful dog is confused as been pulled away from unfriendly. And this served as end of my patience,trying to be nice or keep on communicating with owners who have overly submissive, socially retarded made dogs and simply not the smartest themselves. It scares me to think,whats wrong in their own lives, as dog is our reflection.everybody with N

With that been said,I can honestly admit that for some time I thought there is a problem on our end. But after numerous researches and professional advises it came crystal clear,that we have healthy thinking and behavior, far from any dominance or aggression. Along the way digging deeper into such behaviors I came across great paper from BARK, that talks about dog playing.Nietzsche and Smoke

It says: Marc Bekoff, while at the University of Colorado, did a study1 showing that dogs are most likely to play bow just before or immediately after performing an especially assertive behavior, such as a bite accompanied by a head shake. This pattern suggests that playing dogs recognize moments when their behavior can be misinterpreted as serious aggression and compensate by reminding their partner, “I’m still playing.” This absolutely hits the spot! As huge amount of dog owners don`t recognize natural way of dogs. Further on is states that: research shows that for many dogs, play fighting is the primary method used to negotiate new relationships and develop lasting friendships. Although play is fun, it also offers serious opportunities to communicate with another dog. In this sense, play is a kind of languageanimals engage in social play, research suggests that animals play to help form social bonds, enhance cognitive development, exercise and/or practice coping skills for life’s unexpected situations. All of these benefits, if real, are important to our dogs.” Reading this, just confirmed what I already knew,but needed extra reassurance, that its not only my wild imagination about Animal Kingdom. On the other hand, human interruption causes damage in natural way of dog communication. How I love to say “Let them deal on their own terms. We humans have our rules,they have theirs.”

N and Smoke canon

Same time its not only about my dog anymore,its about others too. Those owners of lab/retriever seems to have absolute belief by having “perfect American dog,like the Joneses” there is no problems on their side of the fence. Their dogs fall in stressed/ distressed/ fearful/ worried category. I will not take the liberty to speculate how they became that way,as all I want to address is Dog Code. And how unnatural and wrong is their owner treatment of situation. What upsets me the most are those who would not even take a slightest chance of possibility to investigate the problem, but keep on going. Ignoring, doing the blame game and causing dog to have a miserable life!N and Grace

Dogs who are not properly socialized develop more then one problem in their behavior and life. Its absolute owners responsibility to deliver the best to their companion. As we have so many options to entertain ourselves and get away, but what does our dog have? Only You! So tell me,how can constant control over a dog; to never play around, be even humane? I seriously think, that some people should not be allowed to have children or dogs, based on their self-centerednes. Buy a dog figurine,it will be easy to control!

sleeping3 babies

 

With this been said and done, I encourage all dog owners to become truly dog lovers. Embrace your dogs differences and work on issues, don`t even dare to start blame game! Become his best friend, as God already made sure he is yours! By having truly happy dog you will lose pounds of unnecessary problems in your own life. Start to be a blessing to the one who adores and loves you even when you are at your worst. Dogs will obey almost all abuse because of their loyalty, don`t take cold blooded advantage of it! Be a blessing, because what goes around comes around.

 field2we

Resources: Article by Barbara B. Smuts and Camille Ward “Is your dog`s rough play appropriate?”

04/26/13

Love it,when you have a bad hair day,annoying pimple and dirty shirt, but all that counts is your conversation.

IMG_1118In nowadays society people more then ever tend to pass judgments accordingly to appearance. In a way we grow more and more self-conscious embracing perfectionism from covers of magazines. Today was the day tho,when I was reminded that; not all look at us through superficial lenses. Seeing pass the exterior to actually hear the voice of your core.

During my own life experiences, which have not been the best, when it comes to people reacting to my appearance has led me to grow many wrong beliefs. I was that geeky kid with huge glasses,loving books and talking “nonsense” when everybody was into everything hip. It empowered shyness. Then at teenage years when my body decided to shape into hourglass, out of sudden all eyes where at my new eyes! That hit me really hard, going from unknown to “Hey babe!” It was a rough patch, for clueless romantic to figure out boys hormones and driven attention. Unbelief that out of sudden I am interesting, was hunting me as it never seemed like same level interest anyways. Then photographers one by one where inviting me to do photo shots and my amazement kept on growing how they see beauty. Being a very deep person who loves to think a lots,it was a piece of cake to work in Art Photography industry. As the pictures where stories,messages loaded with passion and sincere depth! What you will not find in Cosmopolitan. On the other hand, after working with professionals made me despise more and more primitive instincts. Clash between respect to a body and a person for one was the same, for other two different things. Disrespect was mostly what I saw from men,as they always pushed for one thing, making me feel like I am just a sex object (not a good feeling)

Later on in life after many not happily ever after stories,I realized, how differently wired we are (I wish I would have known it then! Would have saved many heartbreaks). From that moment I started giving up my wrong beliefs about myself and how others see me. It was a breakthrough! (Imagine a light bulb above my head shining bright like a sun!) Stress and heavy feelings accumulated over the years how I see and think about others, looking at me slowly started to vanish,loosing pounds instantly. Burden of “I am just a piece of meat” for their eyes etc changed to “I am gorgeous inside out and I don’t care what they want until I want the same” It helped to lose people pleaser mannerism as well. Which is an awesome thing, because too many times saying YES to others you say NO to yourself and then you live with regrets!laughter

Trials and errors and few hits in the head ending with a revelation is something very powerful. Magnificent. Change through hardship with life examples is the way to find answers to so many confusions. I am first generation of “go and figure out on your own whats really wrong in depths” As I untiringly dig in psychology, neuroscience and life, I get many glances “Why are you doing this? Why aren`t you happy with the things the way they are? We all have problems! Its normal!” I don`t believe in such thing as normal anymore. There is an answer to everything, from our issues to our ways we talk,walk and have sex.

To enjoy the best quality in life, you have to have all the right ingredients. Not settling with good, enough or normal. Its existence not living. Fulfillment and abundance is served only for those who put an effort and seek the truth to set them free from whatever holds them back to have joy! Wrong beliefs and negative thoughts about things around you and yourself is the keystone for tripping your own goodness. Mental bondage! If I could change my wrong core beliefs, so can you. I am not saying that they will go away and never come back,but you have to always know that`s manipulating lie to set you back from happiness! You are more then EXTERIOR.

So as I sit here,I am telling YOU to re-think what you think of yourself (Do you like yourself?) What causes you not liking yourself, what are you self-conscious about? All answers are within you! Now,follow through to re-frame wrong/negative beliefs. As its time to set yourself free and breathe :)

 

04/23/13

Taming crickets and calling shots

Thoughts are like guests they will make themselves feel like home as long as you let them stayFew mornings ago I noticed unfamiliar noise in the kitchen, sounds like summer night . First I thought that windows been left open, but they where not. As I go about making my morning coffee the cricket song fulfills the kitchen. Next morning I tried to locate where its hiding,but no luck. As I come closer,it quiet down. Then to stop annoying morning concert I started to be louder in the kitchen,to show who is the boss. Another sunrise comes by and there is no cricket this time. Weird. As I enter the kitchen and felt a little sadness for something I got already used to. No more then 2 minutes passed and it was back! I don’t know why should I have missed that little thing, but you get used to things in life, even when you don’t really fancy them.

Same like habits, most of them develop unconsciously. Like getting used to uncomfortable situations or for that matter shoes! People posses tremendous flexibility.You are the only one in charge to call the shots in your life

On the other hand, cricket is like our unattended thoughts. Like when our mind is not busy, its highway of random thoughts. Unstoppable force, that actually can be controlled,if we take charge. You have to stomp your feet to get rid of unnecessary noise. If you don’t control what you are thinking,it will control you. It will grow stronger and more irritating with time until you get used to it and don’t pay attention anymore, free flow. Or stand up and kick it out of the door!

I don’t know how long can a cricket survive indoors, but what I do know is, that I will not let it consume my attention anymore. That’s another background noise of our lives to distract and stress. If you pay attention and give in,it will cause more damage along the way as you weakened your focus by distraction. To keep your mind well disciplined you need to guard the doors and windows as you only hold the keys to your home of thoughts.